I’ve been wanting to do a post like this for a while now and I have finally gotten round to it, I firstly wanted to state that just because these things happen to me as an anxiety sufferer they may not happen to you as the illness is different for most people but I thought I’d share my experiences and hopefully help someone along the way to understand that they’re not alone. Being stuck with an illness which restricts how you do things and dealing with everyday life, it can often feel isolated, so I thought this may help with that feeling. I hope you enjoy reading, and let me know your thoughts!
Something that should be a simple exchange for most turns into something a lot more difficult, where I am concerned as soon as I join a queue whether that be for food or to purchase something I have to access who I might be served by and then what I can possibly talk to them about, will they judge me? Food is even worse, I have to plan exactly what I am having before I arrive at the till or before the waiter arrives, I often have things I don’t like on my food out of being too scared to be awkward and say I don’t want that on my food.
2. Nights out
Being a university student, nights out are often on the cards but for me they are my worst nightmare. Having a room crammed with drunk people, often touching you, not being able to break free for air. Feeling stuck and the amount of people who could possibly be judging me, what are they thinking about me? What if I fall over? I am honestly petrified of nights out so much I just don’t do them.
This is one of the worst ones for me, whether it is going up or down them I always plan the worst situation in my head. I may fall on my face, I may trip and hurt myself. What if I fall down the bottom two steps and hurt myself. What if I trip up on the way and slip down them. What are people thinking behind me? I like to walk slow up them to make sure I don’t miss any steps but others don’t see it that way.
4. New People
This is one of my WORST fears as an anxiety sufferer, I hate meeting new people. You have to introduce yourself, you have to speak to people and what if you mess up? Like what will they think of you? What if they hate the way I am or speak and think I am weird. I recently started a new job and I panicked for almost a week before hand about what the people would think about me.