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Dear Jess,
Well, I guess that’s what you were called back then. I am now 23, sat in my bedroom in a house I am renting and in some ways, not much has changed, I still live in Stafford, spend an unholy amount of time on the internet, oh and I still love listening to those songs that were on my iPod shuffle, except now I don’t have to use the shuffle feature to pick my favourite song, which I am so glad is not a thing anymore. Back then my music taste was a mix between Dear God by Avenged Sevenfold and Complicated by Avril Lavinge. Come on Complicated was one of her best songs! Oh and the sly, a bit of Nickelback, I mean photograph was a catchy song. I still wear too much black clothing, still love dying my hair and sarcasm is still my number one go to. I bet you’d be shocked riiiiight? MSN has long gone and been replaced with a number of other platforms Snapchat, Whatsapp and Facebook to name but a few, and thank god they were not a big thing when you were growing up (to save you from even more embarrassment!)
I am writing this letter (or blog post to precise) to let you know how things do change when you get older, school might be some of the worst times of your life (the worst so far for sure!) But when you’re gone, you can begin to be a new you, and what happened in P.E or Maths class is pretty damn irrelevant now. You’ll be happy to know you gained some confidence in yourself and started reaching out and talking to people, like in shops and everything! Back then when your friends had to order in the shop for you, as you were too scared. You are now that friend.
You’ll be glad to know all of those items which your mum called clutter you still have, and they make you smile everytime you see them. I mean tickets from your first gig are pretty impressive to still have 10 years later. The weird photos you took of Josh Franceschi on a camera so bad that he basically looks like some next level blob, but you remember that night like it was yesterday. The people that were in your life during some of your darkest times sadly aren’t really around much anymore, but sometimes I guess that’s for the best. Despite hating education, you will be happy to know you actually made it through university.
Those people you met on the internet all of those years ago are still your friends on social media, which is pretty cool and it has been fun to see them grow too. Alex even married the guy she met online all of those years ago, cool right? Although you’re no longer spending your life online on chat rooms or pouring your heart out to strangers (ok maybe, I am still doing this) you are still finding yourself and learning the majority of this online thanks to the world of blogging. The future does get better, I promise you now. Those people won’t even be in your life in 4 years time. You’ll pass them in the street and feel a sense of freedom you were looking for all of those years. Some will achieve more than you and probably look down on you like you always did, but right now you are living your best life.
You do all of those things that people used to insult you for, you still dye your hair bright colours, have those piercings, finally got those tattoos you always wanted (maybe, slightly modified…) but you’re still wearing those band tees and with your Dr Martens and rocking the quirky as ever style.
Turns out some things never change huh?
Lots of love your slightly smarter and older self,
You do all of those things that people used to insult you for, you still dye your hair bright colours, have those piercings, finally got those tattoos you always wanted (maybe, slightly modified…) but you’re still wearing those band tees and with your Dr Martens and rocking the quirky as ever style.
Turns out some things never change huh?
Lots of love your slightly smarter and older self,
Olivia xoxo
